The toaster oven chef is gearing up for a quiet holiday with just me and my house guests - my friend's two cats she dropped off for 6 months...Merry Christmas!! Actually I like the little buggars and since I am spending the holidays in NYC they will keep me company while I try out new recipes and see if I can keep from burning the apartment down.
My newest endeavor has been to roast nuts in the toaster oven - if street vendors can do it, why not me?! And, you can roast just enough for one. I got the idea from a friend who thought I should have some nuts with my nog - eggnog that is...
Yes, I am an eggnog drinker. Normally the 17lbs I gain over the holidays is due to the 2-3 gallons of eggnog I put away over the course of the holiday period from Christmas to New Year. So, I have had to go dry on the nog for the past couple of years - gotta find a man and keep him and apparently a belly of jelly from nog is somehow not attractive...?
So this year I wanted to make my own eggnog and nuts - why not! So, I cover my nuts with brown sugar and butter - set them in the TO all nice and cozy and let them roast. Then I get to brewing on the eggnog. Never having done this before I follow the directions precisely - only deviating to take small swings of brandy from time to time.
Fun things in my recipe were:
Current estimates show that there is a 1 in 10,000 chance that the eggs in your nog could contain a harmful bacteria. To avoid the possibility of food poisoning the Center for Science in the Public Interest recommends that you slowly heat the eggs to 160 F before using. Another way to tell if the eggs are ready is if they coat a metal spoon.
Oh great - I could die from making my own eggnog. I wonder if I should try it out on the cats first?
Many believe that eggnog is a tradition that was brought to America from Europe. This is partially true. Eggnog is related to various milk and wine punches that had been concocted long ago in the "Old World". However, in America a new twist was put on the theme. Rum was used in the place of wine.
Good old Americans go for the harder stuff....that's us! I chose Brandy instead of rum because, well basically it was all I had on hand at the time.
As I am getting into the festive mood with the nuts roasting and the eggnog a frothing...the brandy a swirling I suddenly see flames leap out of my toaster oven - and since I have no smoke detector hear only the cats shrieks of fear.
Not thinking, I throw the brandy on the toaster oven and watch it produce a glorious ball of fire. And then I remember I am drunk and should do something. So I grab flour - why do I have flour? Oh yeah - that one failed baking attempt. And dump it on the oven.
As you can guess my nuts were definitely roasted and since the burning was in the air - I did not notice the pan of eggnog smoking until it was too late and there was nothing to salvage.
So... I am still off eggnog...now need another new toaster oven and never got to eat my roasted nuts. But I do have two cats and half a bottle of Brandy to get me through so I think it will be a very merry Christmas after all.
We've just gotten back from seeing Andrea Bocelli, we saw Elton John earlier this month, and we've seen countless other fantastic performers...but nothing compares to the ultimate piano man, our Nicholas Charles Bobbe! Look out world here comes a star...
Another round of 1st moments for Nicholas. This weekend I discovered his first tooth, which of course means i need to buy him his first set of shit-kickers.....i mean walking shoes. =)
Discovering it wasn't that hard, but getting a photo of it....well, you can see from below that he was none too pleased.
This also means that we will soon have the joy of attempting to brush his tooth (one more than all of Hamburg, NJ). A
We were also very excited because it came before his 1st birthday (11/9/06) and so hopefully lots of people will get to see him soon with that awkward pumpkin tooth smile.
Lastly, the MWUBW store is now open for business! There are only a few items/designs so far but more will follow. All are original MWUBW designs and we are always open to suggestions on product or designs so feel free to send them.
To shop just go here https://www.spreadshirt.com/shop.php?sid=57313
So I'm heading over to Bryant Park with my friend Alex yesterday for lunch. We are chatting away about the same ol' when all of a sudden i get bumped on the head and my vision is filled with feathers. It happened quickly and with no apparent notice by the feather owner.
"Holy shit!" we both yell when realizing that a pigeon just glided off my head on its way down to the sidewalk. That pigeon actually just bounced off my head...who does that happen to? really? After the laughter starts to subside I'm just left with the inexplicable feeling that I tend to be a magnet for "that never happens" moments.
I told Holly the story (she's still laughing), and she is convinced that the filthy little flying rat (my words) thought my head must be a runway (imagine an arial view of my hairline).
To better explain the scenario I've provided a diagram.
And I am well aware that it could have been worse. I mean I could have been this poor boy or this clearly not happy little girl.
I think in the end the lesson here is that pigeons suck and we should do all we can to destroy them. I mean just take a look at one of many sites with this mission in mind.
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Hair issues suck! And though I've been dealing with hair loss since 4th grade or somewhere around there (don't be fooled, I'm still one sexy bastard!), I now have a new and unique hair problem.
This new problem involves the dog's hair piercing itself into the bottom of my feet. I walk around the house barefoot a lot and about a month or so ago I felt this sharp pain in my foot. At first look i saw nothing, but as i continued to walk it felt like I had a cut on my foot. After closer inspection I discovered a dog hair that was about 1/4" into the bottom of my foot. Ok, weird, but whatever. Unfortunately this has become an ever increasing issue.....WTF! are my feet the perfect texture for piercing? Are these dog hairs made of titanium? Why doesn't it happen to Holly?
So now instead of just dealing with the task of making balding look good, now i have to deal with razor dog hairs that attack my feet on a regular basis...i mean, they couldn't have chose my head to pierce themselves?....this sucks!
Ok, so long overdue, here are some photos of Holly and I locked and loaded! Those poor clay pidgeons never saw it coming!
First we get some gun safety and technique lessons from Greg. We were using both a 20 guage and a 12 guage, both break guns, the 12 was a dual trigger (yeah thats right, try and out race my trigger finger!)
Then it was time to shoot some stuff!!
Greg and Kathy jumped in to show us how its really done.
Holly is lining up her first victim in this first shot (pun intended), then notice its non existence in the following shot.
You will also notice my perfect "Don't f'n move asshole!" stance.
So, recently I have been neglecting the little oven that could...work, family infiltrations, trip to Viagra Falls...and more. So Travis has been bothering me for weeks to get a recipe in - and I realized I really don't give recipes per se, but more of TOC useful advice and lessons learned. And after this lesson, I think you will really have learned from my trials of playing with fire and drinking habits.
So, I was racking my brain on what to talk about...when my friend Robin gave me a BRILLIANT idea...he knows my favorite dessert is Crème Brule and suggested I attempt Crème Brule ala toaster oven. Well, I was a bit turned off from the idea at first because I am not a baker...not in the least. Not in the slightest. I so want to be a baker, but I am just not. It's like math or something and it wigs me out. If you screw up baking you can't eat it - but you can always fix a cooking mishap...just drink more wine and everything is fine!
Ok, so I thought about the Crème Brule a bit, read the recipe and then saw it...blow torch! I totally forgot I would get to use a freaking blow torch. I was so in!!!
I immediately went out and bought my mini blow torch - with goggles! - and started practicing torching things. I went through a pack of hot dogs, a loaf of bread - I only caught two slices on fire "fire" - little scary but I had the goggles so I was cool. After a few more practice torch runs with sugar on bread - because I would have to "lightly brown the sugary top" without turning it black - I was ready to rock and roll.
Whipping up the Crème Brule was so annoying - I had to separate egg yolks, heat whipping cream, pour in sugar - the whole nine yards and then STRAIN IT INTO A PITCHER! Mind you - when I am cooking with "the oven" I've already had half a bottle of my favorite Shiraz since all I have to do is take out a salmon steak, squeeze lemon and sea salt and throw that puppy in "the oven"....what was all of this stirring and whipping and straining crap?
But it gets better... now I had to make something called a "water bath". This is where you take the little baking pan (now I know what that is for) that comes in the toaster oven, and you pour just enough water around your ramekins (small little cute bowls) so your eggs and cream do not curdle...see if you screw this up - you can't eat it! If my salmon comes out a tad overcooked....I will just eat it while killing off the rest of the bottle.
But whatever, I have my eye on the blow torch and nothing - and I do mean nothing....not even the stupidity of using PLASTIC ramekins the first go around and having my brand new toaster oven dripping with melted plastic, eggs and cream could stop me. Not the smell of it, the cleaning up of it nor the buying of PORCELAIN ramekins (take a note - no short cuts in baking like there are in cooking), not even the snotty look the woman gave me at William and Sonoma (and we all know how I fell about snotty looks) could stop me. I was beyond the toaster oven...I needed to torch something!
I went through all the steps again - bought new "baking pan" for TO (which I will never use again) - and popped the new little water bathed ramekins into the oven.
I finally uncorked the wine because if this did not work I had seen some weeds outside that were in need of blow torching and I was in need of a drink by then.
A few minutes later - the TO is quick I tell you - I could see my sugary little ramekins bubbling and it was time to pull them out. I took one last swallow of wine for good measure, put on the goggles and went to work.
Out of 6, only 2 survived...I think I got a little carried away, maybe it was the wine or the wine...but either way - 2 survived and both tasted like crap. I must have forgot something in the mix?
And so I leave you with this: do not use the toaster oven for baking unless you want to end up with a hangover, no food to show for it and one blacked fingernail because you just had to try to get right up to the tip of the hot dog you roasted for dinner after everything fell apart.
Today's post is a 3-parter! First we'll play "What is it?" This is where i'll place a picture or movie below and you have to guess what it is (please reply in the comments section, not via email). We will follow this with a book review of a book i just finished, and we'll close up this nail biting excitement with a nice discussion of Holly and I armed and dangerous!
What is it?
Book Review - Odd Thomas by Dean Koontz
My sister, Erin, is a huge fan of Dean Koontz. I've never been a follower, but not long ago I borrowed one of his books from her and was very pleased with the read. Recently, however, I was given his novel Odd Thomas. This one really stepped up his notch on my favorite authors list! This book had everything you want and need in a book to really capture you. I've read a lot of books, but this is the first book I've ever read that within the first 5 or so pages I was hooked to the point of not wanting to put it down. Throughout the book I was captivated by the main character and how he was written in such a way that almost anyone can relate to him in some way or another. Overall I must recommend this book as a Must Read! I'm also pleased to learn that there are two more in this series!
Armed & Dangerous - Holly, me & shotguns
Alright, who's scared after reading that? One of my vendors has a place up in Mass. where he goes skeet shooting and he has invited us up to join him. We are both looking forward to safely feeling the 12 guage let loose on some clay pigeons who probably have nothing to fear. I will update you as to how it goes when we get back. Until then, we'll be back!
To my regular MWUBW dist. list, this new blogosphere has things such as QotD and Photo Scavenger Hunts. So from time to time if they interest me I will be posting in response to these. But not to worry, it won't interfere with the normal Wanderings.
How many pets have you owned in your lifetime? Tell us about them.
Submitted by jennajellopy.vox.com.
FIrst off, it happened again last night. The damn frog bank started talking again at 3 am! Not sure what it is with that hour and its creepy-ass malfunctioning but its got a screwdriver jammed into soon in its future!
Look how different Nicholas looked back toward the begining of his arrival...amazing! He still loves to cuddle up on Holly like that though. =)
